Many a morning I have sat down at my laptop with a cup of coffee attempting to write, but it wasn't long before I had to abandon it. And many evenings I have sat down with a glass of wine and made more attempts, but those, too, were abandoned. Here I am again: a new day, a new cup of coffee.
I am now the mother of one child, one special needs child, one toddler, and one newborn.
Isabelle's grand entrance into our lives has made me more aware of the unique challenges that each of my children presents, and I am spending much of my day sitting on the couch nursing the baby and wondering how I'm going to meet those challenges.
At one point in my attempted writing I had decided I would talk about each of the phases that my children are in. You know, what they're up to at these stages of their lives. That'll be cute and fun, I thought. Well, I'm sad to say that I ended up writing a whole list of complaints about each of them. Goodness. I had to stop and remind myself that my hormones aren't straight yet. One day I am euphorically happy and the next day I feel totally depressed.
In this particular moment, I have no clue what to write. That's right, this post has no point, no direction, no moral of the story, no food for thought. It just is. Because I know if I keep putting it off then I will abandon writing altogether. It's not that I'm a good writer (I'm terrible), it's just that I have a strong desire to keep up a blog with pictures (I've been slacking on the picture part.) You see, I have the memory of a goldfish. If I don't write it down, I will forget it.
Memories such as this: the first day we brought Isabelle home from the hospital, and the first time I fed her at home, I said aloud to her, "Are you hungry? Do you want to drink some milk?" My 5-year-old daughter, eager to be a helpful big sister, jumped up and started running for the kitchen, shouting, "I'll get her a cup!!!"
Our fawning over Isabelle has been intense. We all adore her so much.
The last three weeks have been filled with coffee and books and nursing, wine and books and nursing. We've had family board games, Planet Earth marathons, lots of adorable cloth diapers, and plenty more nursing. Isabelle was baptized, there was a pizza night with friends and a day at the zoo, long afternoon naps, and even more nursing. There have been some failed attempts at cleaning the house, more naps, more coffee, more wine, and more nursing.
There are things we've managed to maintain in our routine: my husband has had the last three weeks off work and he's been cooking the dinners and doing school with the kids. We've even upheld our weekly trips to the library. But naturally, other things have fallen apart. I feel like I no longer have any idea how to Adult (who let me Adult? I can't Adult.)
Newborns have a way of forcing you to slow down. I know I need to take it easy, breath it in, and drink it up because it goes so fast.
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