the heroic details

I sit down to write this on the final day of May.  I just nursed the two-year-old to sleep, laid her in the bed, cracked the window, and sat down at my desk with a steaming mug of tea and tiny cup of chocolate chips.  A cool breeze is gently fluttering the curtains, a rabbit is nibbling on something in the yard, and a light but silent rain falls. This month the children asked me if they could make youtube videos.  I said yes, and also agreed to assist them.  We began to bring our camera on our adventures and to film our days, after which I would edit the footage into something cohesive before uploading it to our channel.  We made videos at the park, the nature center, the lake, the library, the children's museum, and the farm.  We made videos of us baking and having tea, making popsicles and eating them, and even trying to potty train Isabelle.  The kids also acted out a couple of little skits.  It's been a lot of fun for all of us.  I am certain that I will c

I fell to a cold on Holy Saturday - the 15th of April - and I'm still fighting it today, the 2nd of May.  It has been 18 days of a particularly harsh cold that I am only just now beginning to recover from.  Of course, it threw the last two weeks of April completely off-kilter and has forced a turbulent start to May. Over the last two weeks I came to an important decision for our family.  A decision that I still don't know is the right or wrong one, but the one I think  needs  to be made.  Sometimes necessary decisions are not always the "best" decisions, they are simply inescapable.  I fear shame, ridicule, and judgment from others when they find out. I'm literally standing at my computer desk to write this, gently rocking and swaying to keep the toddler asleep in the carrier on my back.  Even sitting  at a desk is sometimes too much to ask in this season of my life. My parents came on the last day of March, a Friday.  The arrived in the late afternoo